The Armani Suit Has Slipped

Dear Philip Nolan,

With ruthless efficiency you and the other suits in Eircom have ruined Ireland’s Internet and Broadband future. You have made Ireland the laughing stock of the International Community. You have succeeded in achieving the unimaginable: To bring an educated, young, English speaking, IT hungry, northerly nation to the bottom of the European and OECD broadband and Internet league tables. For short-sighted corporate greed you’ve done unbelievable, irreparable damage to the nation.

In the most arrogant way you and David McRedmond have deceived, misinformed and manipulated the public about the devastating consequences of your company’s kleptomaniac agenda. In a barrage of radio, television and press Interviews, in advertising and PR campaigns no lie was too dirty, no manipulative trick too cheap, no manoeuvring too low.

A public media, in aw and on the receiving end of Eircom’s huge advertising budget, allowed you to make us listen to your cynical fairy-tales: Thanks to Eircom Ireland had the fastest broadband rollout of Europe, we were overtaking the likes of Luxembourg and soon the rest of them, our broadband coverage was en par with most in Europe, our pricing was below that of Europe, your “trigger programme” would help rural areas…

Whenever someone managed to call your bluff, you simply told us with a smirk on your face that you were after all only responsible for the interests of Eircom’s shareholders.

Philip, for you and your directorial colleagues this was all a highly paid game. The citizens and the fortune of the nation were merely pawns that could be disregarded and manipulated at will. Being found out to have lied to and mislead the public was inconsequential.
Like the Burkes and Lawlers of this world you thought you had your “keep me out of jail card” included with your job perks.

But games can take unpredictable turns. Finally your Armani suit slipped aside, we’ve seen your underwear – and it seems to be dirty.

Your turn, Philip, take the chance card in our monopoly round!



The times when white-collar criminality would simply be overlooked are over. There are reasonably strong indications that Eircom has offended in a serious and substantial manner against sections of the Consumer Information Act of 1978 on four separate matters. The most serious offence lies at the heart of Ireland’s broadband and Internet uptake failure.
We’ve supplied our findings to the Office of the Director of Consumer Affairs and asked the ODCA to investigate the alleged offences and bring prosecutions against the Eircom managers responsible. The Consumer Information Act of 1978 provides for jail terms of up to 2 years on conviction.

We’ve provided a presentation to the members of the Oireachtas Committee on Communications about what we consider to be the most serious offence under the Consumer Information Act.
The other issues brought to the attention of the ODCA have to do with Eircom’s misleading online net calculator, Eircom’s misleading Directory Enquiry advertisements and with profiteering through intentionally booby-trapped Terms and Conditions.

Download the presentation to the Oireachtas Committee as a pdf. or read the

Short Version:

What is it about?
With the introduction of flat-rate Internet access services (FRIACO) in mid 2003 (after a ministerial directive by Dermot Ahern to ComReg) Eircom's "net subscription" Internet access service became obsolete. The "net subscription" has become nothing but a financial burden for its customers, paying above the odds under any Internet usage pattern. Around 200 000 "net subscription" customers, who pay a monthly €18.44 subscription and ridiculous per-minute access fees, are kept in the service by illegal procedures and net Eircom a 100 million profit per year. This is a case of illegal financial profiteering that pales the shenanigans of AIB and National Irish bank. Worst of all, not only are the "net subscription" customers ripped-off, but this profitable illegal business practice is a severe hindrance for Eircom to roll-out broadband quickly and to more than 60% of the population, in order to hold on to these cash cows for as long as possible.

How does Eircom do it?
Eircom intentionally misleads its existing "net subscription" customers about the service.
It keeps telling consumers that the "net subscription" is still the recommended service for day-time Internet users. See picture from Eircom's website, where the company claims to advise consumers: "It doesn't matter if you're a light or heavy user, eircom net have the option to suit you.":



Eircom has pulled all but this misleading information about the "net subscrition" service from its website, so that existing customers have no chance to compare the service they are on with the new flat-rate services.

Why should customers get compensated and the Eircom managers in charge go to jail?
Under Section 6 of the Consumer Information Act it is an offence to mislead consumers into buying a service by making false (to a material degree) or misleading statements in relation to services and sets penalties for up to two years imprisonment.

Will the ODCA (Office of the Director of Consumer Affairs) act decisively to uphold the law?
There is always hope… It would "help" the investigating officers if they got public support for the case.

Hints for investigative journalists:

Eircom will claim that it is no longer selling the service to new customers. – So, what? That is not the accusation.

Eircom will claim the recommendation on the web site was a mishap. – Eircom's website is one of the most visited websites in Ireland and nothing is there by mistake. Besides, it would not make any difference under the Consumer Information Act.

Eircom will claim it is contacting existing "net subscription" users by phone to take them off the service. – That must be a very "successful" operation, when one and a half years after the service became obsolete still 15% of Ireland's Internet access is via net subscription (ComReg figures). No harm to ask Eircom and ComReg about the current number of subscribers to this obsolete service.

Eircom might admit that the claim about the service being still recommended for heavy day time users was "outdated", but then claim that the figures of savings over the "Free" service in the table were correct. – They are not and never were. "Giving you savings of ... over 20% every weekend and evening" is simply a wrong claim. It would take a net subscription user to clock up 950 off-peak Internet hours in a single month, to achieve savings of 20% over the "Free" access. The theoretical 20% difference in the per minute rate does not translate into a 20% saving for the customer. Interestingly a net subscription user would need to clock up 3000 hours of daytime surfing (in a single month!) for the 60% per minute price difference to translate into a 60% saving on the overall bill.